I have not been posting regularly lately and I have a fresh, new, and exciting reason for it.
I have a part-time job.
It’s not a big deal and it didn’t deserve that kind of introduction. It pays about three dollars and fifty cents less than my full-time job, but it;s work-from-home, and that’s why I took it. It’s effect on my life, mainly on my free time, has been draining. When I get home, it’s work, work, work until the work is done, and what doesn’t get done before bedtime just doesn’t get done, and that includes the writing. Especially the writing.
I knew this would happen, when I was looking for the job. I have a full- time job. Apart from that, I have to set aside time for writing my novel. I have to set aside time to write this blog three times a week. I also have to reserve between ten and twenty hours a week for this part-time job. I also want to start a YouTube channel. That would be difficult even if I just worked 40 hours from home. Something was going to get left behind, especially in these early weeks when I’m learning the job and figuring out how to manage myself. Or something was going to get a lot less attention. And, this blog is the odd man out.
Why?
well…the novel is more important, right now. I have a novel in me, a good novel, and if I don’t write it, if I prioritize other things, like this blog, like my job, and it never gets written, I believe that will have been a waste of my ability. So, I am trying to bear down hard on myself, to get this done and written well. I have to, need to, work on it every day. Everything else comes second, third, etc.
I give three, three and a half hours to my second job when I get home. The available workload is sporadic. I have to work quickly and steadily to get my twenty hours, when the work’s available. After three hours or more, it’s 7:30, or sometimes past 8, if I started late because of other priorities, like going to the store, or talking to family (which is simply a necessity during this pandemic). It’s time for dinner and then I start winding everything down for bed.
I knew it would be like this – my open hours would disappear, my priorities, which had already crystallized, would expand and push everything out, and I would be left sitting, in a spare bathroom moment, reviewing all my unrealized aspirations and wondering if a part of me is unrealized, as well. But knowing doesn’t lessen the pressure or give me more time to do what I need to do, and honor my commitment to posting at least three times a week.
A First World problem, to be sure, and, when I take a few steps back, I am thankful it’s the worst problem I have. I have my family and friends. I have my job. I am not infected. I feel healthy.
I posted a blog today. I feel good about that.
Do what you are. Stay safe. Take care of yourself. Keep reading. Keep writing.
Mark Earnest Johnson 